Daily Life,  The Counselor

“Are You Bored?” Inquiring Minds Want to Know

Since the chemist began working at the lab every day during the first week of September, many of you have asked what on earth the counselor is doing? Here is a ramble through my rambling days, complete with my “real-world” photos. (In other words, I promise to get you back to the chemist’s much prettier photos in the next post!)

The truth is, my days look pretty different from my usual life, which is not the easiest transition but is part of the point of this year. What’s the good of living in another country if you try to make your life look exactly the same as it always did? At least that’s how I feel about it. Easy? No. Hardship? Also no.

Daily life for us in Seoul takes extra time and energy. Going to the grocery store requires the work of figuring out unfamiliar products and doing some translating. Plus we have to take transit or walk, meaning we can buy only as much as we can carry. We do have many groceries delivered, but the on-line system requires lots of searching and translating, which also takes a long time. Sometime I’ll do a post about going to the grocery store here, as it tends to be pretty overwhelming. Just last week I finally managed a trip without any moments of panic!

First solo grocery trip accomplished!

We have a small kitchen without much storage space, and we don’t want to stock up too much in case we decide to change apartments at some point. This means there are more frequent grocery trips. I’m cooking with one pot and one skillet on a small stove-top only, plus using some unfamiliar ingredients. There are fewer familiar “short-cut” ingredients here too (for example, very few frozen or canned vegetables that I have found, and the few I’ve seen around are expensive). This means cooking takes longer that I’m used to.

We have a very small washing machine and no dryer, so laundry has to be done frequently and takes longer. At some point this all might get old, but the more I get used to things here, the quicker some of these daily routines become. For the moment, they keep me reasonably occupied, and they make me feel like I’m participating in “real life” in Seoul. It wouldn’t be as fun if everything were exactly the same as home!

Always happy when it’s sunny on laundry day!

I’m also aware some of you have lived in places where daily life was much more different and much harder than this. And of course, people who do not share many of the privileges we still have are experiencing substantially greater hardships on a daily basis. We’re not exactly living in a developing nation, and we are fortunate to have every single thing we need, plus a lot that others don’t have. We still get to make a lot of choices about how we will live, and we feel physically safe here.

The role of technology in helping adjustment here is remarkable. So much has changed even since we moved to Vancouver 15 years ago! Staying in touch is lots easier. I can stay connected with family and friends through video chats and social media, continue mentoring new palliative social workers (via FaceTime) through the Zelda Foster Studies program at NYU, record music for virtual church, volunteer to make calls with Democrats Abroad, and study Korean language, culture, and history with virtual lessons. I’m also meeting people in Seoul through groups on Facebook and KakaoTalk, a Korean social media forum.

We’ve met a few acquaintances here for “live” social time. We’re grateful to friends from home who have been able to introduce us to their friends in Seoul, several of whom we’ve been able to meet for a meal or a walk. Hopefully, meeting people also will become easier as COVID restrictions continue to lighten. There’s an international hiking group I’ve joined, and they’re just beginning to take group hikes again. Other meet-up groups are also getting re-started, so I’m looking forward to meeting people that way.

If I don’t have other things to do and it’s a nice day, I have gotten comfortable taking walks and exploring new places by myself. I prefer having a walking buddy, but I also have enjoyed the freedom of going where I want when I want! And in my head I’m having a conversation with all of you about how I’m going to tell you about it. Oddly enough, this makes me feel like I’m in good company even when I’m on a solo adventure. As it turns out, a little blog therapy is pretty good.

After my first big solo trip to the grocery store (oh, the excitement!), I took the subway a stop further and visited Yongsan Family Park and the grounds of the National Museum of Korea. The park used to be part of the Yongsan Garrison, a U.S. military base, but in the 1990s it was converted into this very nice park with walking paths, outdoor sculptures, and a community garden. The museums are still COVID-closed, but the parks were really pretty to walk around. I’m excited to visit the National Museum when it re-opens, which might even happen next week.

Another subway stop beyond that took me to Dongjak, a great point for accessing the Hangang Park south of the river. I almost put earbuds in, and I’m so glad I didn’t. I might have missed these pan flute players!

To answer the original question – I’m not bored. Life is certainly not the same pace I’m used to, but that’s okay for now. My focus on keeping our daily life going means that when Peter isn’t working, we can use all that time to explore together. We are slowly meeting people and forming new connections. I’m good for now, and we’ll see where this year takes me!

10 Comments

  • Miyo Moriuchi

    Hi Emily & Peter,
    Such a pleasure to read each of your blog entries! I lived abroad 2x Tokyo 1971-73 teaching English at Tokyo Friends girls school and 2005-06 in Nakhon si Thammarat Thailand teaching with a proper MAT. Each time a transition in my life and each time a good challenge to creating my own space, discover a new culture and make new friends. In Thailand finding the big box store Tesco I could get granola, yogurt, juice, Oatmeal, coffee so I could start my day with familiar food. Laundry improved after I discovered the service where the man picked up on his motorbike with sidecar and a few days later all returned including jeans & sheets freshly clean and ironed. I cooked on a single hot plate, hot pot and rice cooker.
    Fun living vicariously through your adventures. You’re experienced so I assume you know the stages of culture shock/adjustment. Those who never venture out of their cocoon never get the eye & heart opening that you’re experiencing.
    Thanks so much!
    💕Miyo

    • mledare

      Hi Miyo,
      I love hearing about your travel and life abroad adventures! I’m so appreciative of your sharing. I am always amazed to think of the many people in my life who traveled and lived abroad before all of the technology that makes life away from home so much easier now. It is so exciting to figure out those little things – like finding familiar foods – that turn out not to be such little things! My guess is that the worst of our culture shock will coincide with the holidays, but I suppose only time will tell. Meanwhile, we’re trying to build as many connections as we can to create for ourselves a softer landing place for when it hits. Thank you, thank you for being a resource and such an empathetic participant in this blog experiment!

      Peace,
      Emily

  • Nancy Thayer

    Its so good to hear about your life there. You are creative and interested and active, so your life sounds about right–just different. It’s fun to feel like I’m a part of your time there. Thanks. N

  • Jane S Dugdale

    It takes me back to some of my times living abroad, but it also reminds me that living in COVID in the US has some similar adjustments: especially shopping. Thanks so much for this wonderful blogging. Makes me think I should get back to it. Love your stories and fotos. Enjoy!

    • mledare

      Jane, you’re so right. Many aspects of life have changed so much even for people living in their familiar place. An upside down time all over the world! I’m sure you also have many fascinating stories about life abroad. So happy you’re following along with us! Love, Emily

  • Mary K

    Well, it’s been lovely to hear about your days in South Korea, and I’m glad that you’re keeping yourself entertained and exploring new things. It’s the first time I’ve really brought myself to read your blog because part of me is still very angry with your husband but I’ll get over that. For those who don’t know me I am of course kidding. We are plodding along with the daily doses of palliative care drama and healthcare chaos but we are still plodding along. You would love working with our fellow, he’s full of energy and a general good soul. There are also gaggles of very qualified and interesting new applicants for fellowship which is really nice to see. We miss you, we hope you may return to palliative care here in Philly and wish you a well deserved change of pace counsellor! Stay well.

    • mledare

      Aw, thanks Mary K. I know you guys are working hard and adding to the “top 10” lists regularly. 😉 So happy to hear about the Fellow and new applicants. That is encouraging. I’m trying to find some contacts who can help me learn more about the healthcare system here. We shall see! I think of you guys often and hope you are staying well in body and spirit. Love and hugs to everyone!